Nicole Thomte, LMFT

Nicole Thomte (she/her or they/them) is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) practicing in Minnesota, license number MN LMFT 3853. With 13 years of clinical experience, Nicole centers work with people, couples, and families who live outside dominant societal expectations and who often face marginalization. Their practice emphasizes affirmative, sex-positive care for LGBTQIA+ clients, people involved in kink and BDSM communities, those in consensually non-monogamous relationships, and others whose identities or relationship structures are misunderstood or stigmatized.

Nicole favors a largely solution-focused orientation coupled with client-centered values - a collaborative, non-directive stance that treats each person as the expert in their own life. Sessions tend to be exploratory and accepting while allowing space for humor and humanity alongside the hard work of change. Nicole also incorporates techniques from approaches such as DBT and CBT when they fit a person’s goals, especially for managing overwhelming emotions, anxiety, or patterns that interfere with daily functioning.

Her clinical background includes early work as a state intern beginning in 2013 at a behavioral health agency serving people with complex needs and limited access to resources. From November 2012 through a hiatus in July 2018, Nicole participated in supervision and co-facilitated survivor groups with Gender Justice Nevada, learning from survivors of sex- and gender-based violence, sex/gender diverse youth, families of gender diverse people, and sex workers. That experience deepened her commitment to advocacy and to therapeutic group and individual work.

Nicole describes her professional identity as compassionate, driven, and tireless in advocating for those pushed to the margins. She aims to offer inclusive, practical support that helps people improve their lives on their own terms and to work collaboratively toward meaningful change.

Therapeutic Approaches and Online Care

Nicole integrates client-centered therapy, solution-focused methods, and dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) into her online work. Client-centered therapy emphasizes an accepting, collaborative relationship where the person’s goals and values guide the work - this is useful for exploring identity, relationships, and self-esteem. Solution-focused therapy concentrates on practical steps and strengths to create change quickly, which can help with relationship challenges, coping with life transitions, and managing stress. DBT offers concrete skills for emotion regulation, distress tolerance, and improving interpersonal effectiveness, making it helpful for people who struggle with intense emotions or recurring conflict.

Finding the right therapeutic approach is part of the process and Nicole works collaboratively with each person to determine which methods fit their needs, goals, and preferences. Together they identify priorities, try strategies, and adjust the plan over time so the work stays focused and relevant.

Online therapy through video calls, phone sessions, live chat, or text-based messaging offers flexibility that fits busy or geographically spread lives. These options let people access licensed professionals from home, fit sessions into varied schedules, and maintain continuity of care through transitions. Nicole uses these modalities to make consistent, responsive support more accessible while tailoring the format to each person’s communication style and needs.